Celebrity Death Haiku

Ronald Searle

1920–2011

Ask not for whom the
Belles of St. Trinian's toll —
They toll for Ronald

— Lairbo

 

Harry Morgan

1915-2011

Cowpoke to colonel
Cop in between; looked 50
For as many years

-- Abbie Rhodes

 

Bil Keane

1921–2011

Dotted line showing 
Bil’s tortuous pathway home 
Just got new end point

— Dr. Vitz

 

Amy Winehouse

1983–2011

Hey Amy Winehouse — 
That "won't go to rehab" thing,
How did that work out?

— Jeff Tiedrich

 * * *

Cautionary tale:
When they say "go to rehab"
Don't say "no no no"  

— Jeff Tiedrich

* * *

Perhaps what's saddest
About this untimely death
Is that no one's shocked

— Inshallah 

Peter Falk

1927-2011

I guess the Reaper
Wasn't taken in by that
"One more question" ruse

-- Jeff Tiedrich

Clarence Clemons

1942-2011

You can't imagine
Born to Run without sax break?
Now it's easier

Dr. Vitz

 

Jackie Cooper

1922–2011

No matter what he 
Showed up in, you were always
Happy to see him

— Lairbo

 

Elizabeth Taylor

1932 - 2011

Many husbands and
Violet eyes we'd die for...
If she hadn't first 

-- Dr. Vitz

* * *

And you think you have
A hard time remembering
Anniversaries

-- Loren Ipsum

* * *

Her beauty upstaged
Her talent, her marriages
Overshadowed both

-- Roger Rabbid

 * * *

Hilton, Wilding, Todd
Fisher, Burton and Burton,
Warner, Fortensky

— Lairbo

 

Suze Rotolo

1943–2011

Brushed off her brush with
Someone else's fame, alright
She didn't look back

— Lairbo

 

Maria Schneider

1952 – 2011

Best known for getting
Buttered up by Brando for
That one last tango

— Russell 1000

Susannah York

1939 – 2011

Major reason that
Women with British accents
Always get me hot

— Roger Rabid

 

Don Kirshner

1934 – 2011

Sullivan in a
Leisure suit, only stiffer
And never blinking

— Lairbo

* * *

Impresario
For bubblegum and rock stars
But kept nerdy style

— Dr. Vitz

 

Pete Postlethwaite

1946 – 2011

Postlethwaite's gone, and
Only now, to serve this site
I learn to spell it

— Jeff Tiedrich

 

Don "Captain Beefheart" Van Vliet

1941 – 2010

Van Vliet was a fraud!
First, he lied about his rank.
And his heart? Human.

— Jeff Tiedrich

Blake Edwards

1922 – 2010

Never read a script
That couldn't be improved by
Adding a pie fight

— Lairbo

 

Jill Clayburgh

1944 – 2010

Always played women
On the verge of something and
Nervous about it

— Lairbo

 

James MacArthur

1937 – 2010

McGarret got car
Chases, fisticuffs; Danno
Got the paperwork

— Lairbo

* * *

Can now roll over
In grave at lame remake of
Hawaii 5-0 

— Roger Rabid

 

Joe Mantell

1916 – 2010

In a long career
Of small roles, he got two of
The best lines ever!

— Lairbo

 

Tony Curtis

1925 – 2010

Born a Bronx street kid
Paired with Leigh and Marilyn
Not bad, Bernard Schwartz

— Dr. Vitz

 * * *

Somehow it worked, that
Movie star face with that buzz
Saw Bronx accent

— Lairbo

 * * *

Maybe he never
Said "Yonda lies da castle..."
But we all heard it

— Roger Rabid

 

Arthur Penn

1922 – 2010

Made romantic myth
Out of Bonnie and Clyde who
Were anything but

— Lairbo

 

Gloria Stuart

1910 – 2010

She saw plenty in
Hollywood, including an
Invisible Man

— Lairbo

* * *

Her Titanic role
Was a just tip of  the old
Iceberg for grande dame

— Elkay

Harold Gould

1923 – 2010

Nearly dad of That
Girl and Richie Cunningham;
Wound up as Rhoda's

— O'Cyrus

* * *

Always dapper, suave
And about to get the rug
Pull out from under

— Russell 1000

Kevin McCarthy

1914 – 2010

Lived long for someone
Who would run screaming into
Oncoming traffic

— O'Cyrus

* * *

Whomever he warned
Us about, apparently,
was already here

— P. Shaw

* * *

Not human? You're Next?
They're already here? What the...
Hey, look, a seed pod!

— Lairbo

Patricia Neal

1926 – 2010

More than just a face
In the crowd and, more often
Than not, in harm's way

— Philco

* * *

Tough on the outside
But vulnerable within
Thinking man's Crawford

— Jeff Tiedrich

Mitch Miller

1911 – 2010

At some point we've all
Sung along with him, whether
We knew it or not

— Phil Valens

* * *

With hipster's goatee
And that bouncing ball, Mitch got
Us to sing along

— Jeff Tiedrich

* * *

Now that Mitch has marched
Be Kind to Your Web Footed Friends
Shall be his glory

— Babatjie